Why People Choose A Familiar Hell To An Unfamiliar Heaven

“Growth is uncomfortable because you’ve never been there before…”

Many people know that there are certain things they could be doing differently to improve their lives but are too afraid to do them.

Maybe it’s a book they’ve always wanted to write, a business they want to create, longstanding habits they want to break, or anything else that moves them outside of their comfort zone.

If these things could improve their life, then why don’t they do them?

It has to do with fear of the unknown.

I know that might sound silly considering life can never be fully predictable, but it has to do with needing control, so even if a particular mode of being is not satisfying, at least it is something that can be known.

There’s a saying “Familiar hells are preferred over strange heavens,” and while there may be some exaggeration involved in that statement, it is something that has stuck with me.

So how do we do the things that scare us because they represent going into unknown territory?

I think one of the most important things to know is that growth WILL feel (very) uncomfortable at times.

We may think that if we are on the “right track,” then we won’t feel fear or any negative emotions, but the truth is, when you are going outside of your comfort zone, this will often bring up all sorts of “stuff.”

Your comfort zone usually consists of things you are avoiding, whether they are little or big things.

When you do those things, then you will get unstuck.

The other thing to do is make sure we allow ourselves to rest & recuperate.

When you move outside of your comfort zone, this can be very triggering for our nervous system. If you are highly sensitive, it can take a lot more energy to get back to balance, so recuperation is just as important as doing things that make you grow.

Another tip is to surround yourself with supportive people who are also growth-oriented.

Maybe they are not on the exact same path as you, but when you realize that many of your fears and anxieties are shared by other people, you stop thinking you need to be completely confident and secure all the time. You realize that these feelings are normal and that they are okay.

My last piece of advice is to know that you are more powerful than you know and can handle change.

When you let go of control and allow changes to occur, this can feel scary, but again, fear is not necessarily an indicator that something is wrong. You are just entering new territory, which may feel like hell initially but is actually closer to heaven.